During our vacation my wife wanted to buy me a T-shirt or hat to remember our time together. My response was always the same – I don’t need another hat or shirt. I have plenty at home. The result was the same too. She was frustrated and discouraged. She enjoys shopping and buying gifts for people. It is her love language. It is her way of expressing how she values friendships and values our relationship. Giving gifts gives her satisfaction and purpose.
One evening while we were waiting for our names to be called at a local restaurant my wife and her sister went in to a gift shop. Her sister purchased a couple of things to take home to her grandkids and my wife found a T-shirt she thought I might like. When she showed it to me I immediately responded by saying – I don’t need another T-shirt.
It was obvious that she was frustrated and disappointed. She wanted me to have something to remind us of our trip but I didn’t want to spend more money on something I didn’t need. The gift shop lady was persistent and showed me some hats while we sat outside her store waiting for our table. Gradually I realized that I was ruining the evening and acting selfishly.
I decided to try on a couple of hats and see what my wife thought. She thought the gray hat looked best so we bought one. I was surprised at how quickly my wife’s mood changed. She was glad that I had a hat to remember our trip and glad that I was willing to let her express her love for me with this small gift. Does that make sense?
There is a passage in the Bible when a woman poured costly perfume on Jesus’ head while he was eating dinner with his disciples. When the disciples objected Jesus told them to not stop her. He was willing to receive this woman’s expression of love and kindness (Mark 14:1-9).
Maybe it is true that sometimes it is better to receive than to give. It allows people to do something kind and thoughtful for you. It gives them the opportunity to encourage you and express their love for you. Let me encourage you to be willing to receive as well as give this holiday season. You will be glad you did and they will too!
You can read 365 more stories by the author in his book Let Me Encourage You by Mark Hopper. The holiday sales price is two books for only $30 plus postage ($5). You can order a copy for yourself and give a copy to a friend or family member this holiday season. Order your books today at markh@efreedb.org. You will be glad you did and they will too!
Let Me Encourage You by Mark Hopper 