I don’t remember doing dishes when I was growing up. I know my parents did not own a dish washer until I was middle school. I lived at home during my college years so I never had an apartment until I got married. So I didn’t have a lot of experience washing dishes.

After my wife and I got married she worked full-time while I studied full-time in graduate school. She usually fixed dinner then I would dig into my homework. One day it dawned on me that if I helped wash the dishes we could get them done in half the time. She would have time to relax and I still had time to study.

I preferred to wash and she was willing to dry and put the clean dishes away. It became a good routine. One of the benefits of washing dishes was talking together. I used to say that we solved most of the world’s problems while we washed dishes.

As our children grew up they were expected to wash dishes after dinner. Sometimes I would help them. It gave me an opportunity to talk with them one-on-one.

At family holiday gatherings I often found myself helping with the dishes with my sister-in-law Linda. She and her family lived in Colorado and we lived in Arizona. But it gave us time to catch up on our kids and careers doing dishes after holiday dinners.

There is a passage in the Bible when Jesus washed the feet of his disciples (John 13:1-14). In Bible times most people wore sandals. Dirt roads and pathways left feet dusty and dirty. It was common for a servant to wash the feet of people who entered a home. Jesus took on the role of a servant and washed the feet of his disciples to provide an example for them to follow. True leaders are humble and willing to serve those they lead.

I always said that real men wash dishes and change diapers. We only had cloth diapers when our kids were young. You had to dunk the dirty ones in the toilet before we put them in the washing machine. Real men wash dishes and change diapers.

Let me encourage you to be willing to wash dishes and change diapers. Lead by example. Show your wife and kids that you are a servant leader – willing to do the dirty work. You will be glad you did and they will too!

You can read 365 more stories by the author (one for every day of the year) in his book Let Mark Encourage You by Mark Hopper. You can purchase two books for only $30 plus postage ($5) – buy one for yourself and give one as a gift this holiday season. Order your copies today at markh@efreedb.org.